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[quote=Anonymous]Diagnosed at age 3 1/2 - really almost 4.  Seven years of OT/Speech - never had a great therapist though. Currently with an ok OT and finally a good Speech therapist but only 30 min a week via Zoom. We were on a waitlist for ABA but it never panned out.

Overall, kid is doing well at home as he pretty much always has. He rarely has any behavior issues at home - and at school is fine unless he is bullied by someone -in which case he has learned to speak up (previously used to shut down) - but now he actually fights back and can lose his temper which we are working on. Thankfully, this has only happened a few times. However, it has happened enough that I think he has alienated classmates and is maybe regarded as "weird" or a "crybaby".

He has an IEP and is supposed to get some supports and extra time at school. He is in the 4th grade and making Bs and Cs and a few As - but mostly in music and art which I think everyone gets an A.  He has maybe one or two friends but sees them only at school as they ride another bus, and parents of one child recently moved to the US and do not speak much English, do not drive and do not seem interested in meeting up. The other child is someone that my son hangs out with at school but does not sound that nice, and he is not interested in seeing him outside of school.

Between reading tutors twice a week, homework, music lessons, OT and Speech, his week is pretty full. On the weekends, he has swimming lessons, Sunday school, and he may see a friend from our old neighborhood once a month if we have their family over. However, the childhood friend mostly enjoys coming over and playing at our house more than with our son if that makes sense.

Maybe it's the time of year, but I'm feeling kind of bleak on his outlook -like he is not progressing much at all and I foresee him not being able to make it in middle school as he is fairly immature in his interests and developmentally. He still cannot tie his shoes and wears a slip on kind of shoe. He dresses in pull on kind of clothing which thankfully is the norm for most kids his age. However, I just see the gap between him and NT peers widening so much. I'm almost wondering if he is regressing?!

I'm looking for advice from parents of children with similar SNs who have BTDT. What therapy should he be doing? Any amazing summer camps? I've spent several 100K and countless hours on all kinds of therapies, lessons, camps, programs, social skills groups, nutritionists who have had us do special diets and supplements, the best psychiatrists with trials of meds - but now we are off everything because none of it made any difference - even the ADHD meds never improved his attention that much and he had lots of side effects. His attention is actually OK especially if he is interested or if the teaching is really good. His main issues are extremely slow processing speed and very poor working memory.

Sorry for the long post. I'm just trying to give the most complete picture and looking for any advice as I really am not seeing progress and nothing has made a difference. I know some kids with ASD have a talent or gift - but he does not really excel at anything in particular - but is overall a very good person who wants to do well. He just continues to have motor planning issues and clumsiness that prevent him from playing mainstream sports. He's not into nature, etc and we are definitely not into camping so ruled out Boy Scouts. However, I am trying to help him find his niche and make some good friends. We are also open to looking at private schools starting in middle school.

Any parents with kids who are doing well in MS and HS, please share what helped.[/quote]

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