Reply to I would rather pay for an apartment for my dc

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[quote=Anonymous]Agree it depends on individual temperaments, finances, etc.

I don't want to feel like I'm running a rooming house. If DD is living with us, I expect the dynamic to be a more adult version of how was during high school -- she has her own life and activities, she comes and goes, but she's still very much a part of the family. I'd expect her to eat dinner with us many nights, for instance, and to let us know when she's going to be out. I'd expect her to do her own laundry and clean up after herself and keep her room mostly in order (not spotless or anything, but not a total wreck). I could see it being nice to be in each others lives in that way, but with her as an adult. If she wanted to live with us during grad school, in the summer, while working, to save money, I'd be more than happy to welcome her.

But I think sometimes college and post-college kids treat their parents' homes like a place to sleep while they go conduct their "real life" elsewhere -- coming and going at all hours with not even a word to their parents, dumping laundry in the laundry room with the expectation someone else will do it, leaving messes in the kitchen and requests for specific foods but never eating a single meal with the family, etc. I would hope DD would not behave like this, but if she did, I would absolutely rather help her pay for an apartment elsewhere than live with that in my house

I'm not an AirBnB, but my home is always a welcoming place for a family member who wants to be part of the home unit for any length of time, at any age.[/quote]

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