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[quote=Anonymous]It was expected that we launch at 18 (my sibling brood that graduated 88-93). We did, and I am glad for it; I, the youngest, craved freedom and independence. I had wild times and no safety net, and I was acutely aware of that. I had times I felt no one could save me, no one could understand. I went through painful depression, alcohol and drug misuse.

I also had wonderful, memorable times, made lots of friends, persevered and became a successful person, despite my mother's real, articulated fear and belief that I would be a freak or a failure.

Worrying about my kid living with me is not one of my worries. One kid is well on his way to success, and will live in our city with us this summer for an internship. The other is much younger. I cannot imagine ever not opening my home to them. Or even, their eventual families, if it came to that.

Even if the worst happened, these are my boys, I am their parent, I am one they can depend on. What is love, if it's not that?*

I read a thing once that said "Extreme indepedence is a trauma reaction" and that fit for me. I could never ask for help. I want the boys to be independent, but to believe that they'll get help if they need it and ask for it.

*Caveats for drawing boundaries for kids who are spoiled, take advantage, are rude, etc.[/quote]

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