Toggle navigation
Toggle navigation
Home
DCUM Forums
Nanny Forums
Events
About DCUM
Advertising
Search
Recent Topics
Hottest Topics
FAQs and Guidelines
Privacy Policy
Your current identity is: Anonymous
Login
Preview
Subject:
Forum Index
»
Family Relationships
Reply to "Sibling rivalry between MIDDLE AGED siblings??"
Subject:
Emoticons
More smilies
Text Color:
Default
Dark Red
Red
Orange
Brown
Yellow
Green
Olive
Cyan
Blue
Dark Blue
Violet
White
Black
Font:
Very Small
Small
Normal
Big
Giant
Close Marks
[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Is this a thing? I notice it among my inlaws. DH is 63, his sisters are 50 and 56. Everything seems to be a competition. If one sibling does or has something worth telling the others then another sibling wants to do or have something similar, but more or better. They post pictures of whatever 'it' is on the family group chat. There also seems to be this constant competition about who does what and how much, or how often, for their elderly mother who is a widow. The bigger the better. My SILs especially seem to be very competitive, especially around gaining their mother's approval. DH not so much, he thinks one of his sisters is too competitive and he tends to stay out of it, or reply with a fairly neutral response on the family group chat. I am surprised this is still happening at their age. I'm an only child so I never had to compete with anyone. [/quote] I'd look at the MIL--is she driving it by withholding love, affection or respect? I know my parents try to pit me and my siblings against each other even now that we're in our 30s and 40s. I moved on from caring years ago, but everytime we're together as a family my parents do their best to reignite competition between us. It's a terrible dynamic and I do my best to just walk away, but it's hard to avoid being sucked in.[/quote] OP here. MIL is lovely but she is closer to - and therefore favors - the SIL who is the middle child. In simplistic terms I think the other 2 adult children are trying to impress their mother in order to gain 'brownie points' and as a result the favored middle child SIL is responding by trying to outdo DH (eldest) and her sister (youngest) to stay at the top of the pecking order. I know this all sounds very dramatic and more context is probably needed, but sometimes this one-upmanship is obvious and sometimes it is subtle. My DH is the more subtle of the 3 and when he does things for his mother he just does them, rather than posting about it on social media.[/quote]
Options
Disable HTML in this message
Disable BB Code in this message
Disable smilies in this message
Review message
Search
Recent Topics
Hottest Topics