Reply to Autism and Sharing Bedroom/Having Own Bedroom

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[quote=Anonymous]DD is at the age where she is wanting her own bedroom. Right now she shares a bedroom, and it's working out well. But the teenage years are coming up, so I'm taking her request for her own room seriously, even though there's no problems. I'd love to get your thoughts on why I'm hesitating. (Also, of course, we'd have to sacrifice our office to  make this happen. So it's not totally painless for us parents.)

I worry her having her own room might WORSEN her well being. She has mild autism and tends to be aloof, but not because she likes being alone. She is literally always happy to be with friends; she's just crappy at initiating. Anyway, I worry that the room will be so attractive that she'll spend more time alone there, which is not good for her. (FWIW, she does have a private space to recharge, just not a bedroom.)

Right now, her bedroom is two flights upstairs. And it's shared and small. So, she doesn't want to hang out there. She hangs out with us on the main level. Which is wonderful! We interact, and I often get her to run errands with me or go out with friends. Those are reliable mood lighteners. I can't exert any such influence if she's cloistered upstairs in her bedroom.

My other concern is that she is super messy. She also has ADHD and is just a total mess. Her own room means an even bigger area for her to spread her junk around. And given all the challenges we have now, I don't want extra stuff to fight about.

The alternative to her having her own room would be to put up one of those temporary pressurized walls. It goes floor to ceiling. It will cut the room in half, but would not give her four walls of privacy. Just one wall. She would still be able to hear her sister, or be affected by the light if her sister was reading. (Again, those aren't problems right now.)

Thank you for reading![/quote]

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