Reply to Anyone dealt with favoritism as a child or adult child? How to overcome hurt?

Forum Index » General Parenting Discussion

Reply to "Anyone dealt with favoritism as a child or adult child? How to overcome hurt?"

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]My mother in law had clear preferences. Oldest daughter her favorite (she gave her her same name), middle daughter next favorite, my husband the dud. I wish I had a good happy ending to tell you. The result has been a lifetime of my husband forever trying to please her and gain her acceptance. To say, she can do no wrong in his eyes and he will never criticize her, because he is forever trying to get and stay in her good graces. It is exhausting and has extended to our kids. I have no relationship with her because of it.

She openly talks about the money she has set aside for namesake daughter's child. Silence on our kids.[/quote]

How old is he? It can take a long time to realize what is going on. Keep in mind he was indoctrinated as a child and those are some of the hardest things to unlearn.[/quote]

DP here.  Yes!  This is very true - DH is the "least favorite" because he was thought of as (however arbitrary, MIL usually is nonsensical and quite random in her choices) "needing the least help". SIL was seen as "most like MIL" and MIL and SIL are undeniably enmeshed and codependent.  SIL is seen as (perhaps rightfully so, but who is to say what is nature and what is nurture, at this far point in time) as being the "most in need".  SIL's children seem to be the only grandchildren that matter, followed by the other SIL's children - and lastly DH and my children.

MIL and SIL  are almost identical, in every way, physically, and mentally (both have extreme depression and anxiety).

It is NOT a healthy place to be, so if you are not the favorite - be thankful, a thousand times over! [/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics