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[quote=Anonymous]Where to start?

First, nothing in your post indicates elitism.  Nothing.

Second, "My DH complained to his parents" - really?  No wonder she had a bad reaction, when a grown-up acts like a high schooler.

Third, in addition to how it was presented, your complaint is out of line.  You expect your inlaws to not go to social events, not see friends, when you are in town for an extended time?  That's selfish, and unreasonable, especially when you aren't (apparently) that close to begin with.

Fourth, you admit that you really go to see your MIL and FIL, but expect them to clear their calendar?

So to recap, you had your MIL shame them into hosting you at their house, and your SIL was cranky about it, and acted put upon.  There's a good reason for that.  One of the definitions of "put upon" is "expected or asked to do too much" - you basically invited yourself to their house over the holidays, and they had to cancel engagements they were looking forward to as a result.  They *were* put upon.  [/quote]

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