Reply to Recently discovered that my grandfather is not my bio

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[quote=Anonymous]I have an adopted sibling. Neither of us ever knew our grandparents. They were alll dead before either of us were born. As an adult, my sibling didn't consider "our" grandparents as hers because she knew she wasn't biologically related AND she'd never had any sort of relationship with them. She had no interest at all in learning about our family history. On the other hand, she did consider our cousins, aunts and uncles as her cousins, aunts and uncles because, while she wasn't biologically related, they were family to her; she knew them. She is as much one of the cousins as I am. I'm not aware that she ever sat down and thought this out. It was just how she dealt with it. Living relatives she dealt with were her family. Ancestors of our parents were not.

So, to me, it wouldn't be insensitive to tell your cousins he wasn't your grandfather and so you're no longer going to call him that if they are all younger than you and don't remember him either. If they are older and knew him and he's part of the family story telling--even if negative--than I'd keep calling him grandpa or whatever term your family uses.

One more thing...there MAY be other explanations for what you've found. Ancestry's "timber" methodology can give rather wacky results. If I were you, I'd hold off "spilling the beans" until you have more information. [/quote]

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