Reply to Husband refuses to help with night feedings

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[quote=Anonymous]Does he drive to the office?

On days he drives, I would say he doesn't get up overnight. Sleep deprivation is a major risk factor for traffic accidents and I prioritize safety and life over making sure everything is 50/50.

Otherwise as long as he is getting 6 ish hours of sleep so he can do his job, then he should be doing some night feedings.

If you aren't getting enough sleep to cope and he doesn't care, that is a bigger issue than trying to be sure both people get up x number of times a night to be sure everything is 50/50. The 50/50 things is really hard to maintain in life as contexts are different and it is better to have a collaborative approach than a ticking boxes about who does what for how many minutes. It sounds like he felt that 50/50 was fair when you were both off work but not fair when he is back at work.

Focus on what you should be mad at - that at a time when you are struggling, he isn't able to be supportive, brainstorm solutions, work with you as a team. Focusing on - well I got up 12 times and you only got up 9 isn't going to get you anywhere. [/quote]

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