Reply to Seeking productive advice for how to deal with ‘always on’ houseguests

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]How about you take your MIL with you. How about DH takes his Father along with him.[/quote]

OP here. “Take them along” where? They don’t want to go on a walk around the nearby lake that has a few playgrounds around it (totally flat and smooth surface, and they have no mobility issues). They don’t want to go see a family movie together. They don’t want to drive through the light show. They don’t want to go to a museum or aquarium. They don’t even want to go out to lunch. If I suggested to MIL she “come along” with me to the grocery store or to get a pedicure, she would not want to go. If DH suggested that FIL “come along” with him to Lowe’s or to rake leaves, he wouldn’t want to.

“But we came here to see YOU” is the constant refrain. If we let the kids go out and ride bikes, that’s frowned upon because “we came here to see YOU.”[/quote]

DH needs to be frank with his parents that the kids can't be expected to sit inside the house all day. "Mom and Dad, the kids need to get outside.  Jennie is taking them to the park. Do you want to come, or do you want to stay here?" (parents complain about wanting to stay and visit) "Ok, you're staying. You'll get to visit more when they get back."

You both need to get comfortable just going about your business and glossing over the protests and disappointment. The activities you are describing are not bad, and you are not being rude. In fact, it's typically considered polite for houseguests to make themselves scare for at least part of the visit so the hosts can have some downtime. 
[/quote]

Also, you in your Op you said this "Any mention of anyone leaving the house, doing their own thing, or reading a book is “rude.”  "  Have they actually called you all rude? Or do they just huff and puff and frown? I would ignore huffing and frowing, but if they are complaining and calling you all rude DH needs to talk to them before they come. Address it directly by saying "We'd love to have you guys, but while you are here the kids need to get outside, Jennie needs to do laundry, I need to do some work. If you are going to complain and call us rude if we do those things, we need to shorten your visit to one or two nights."[/quote]

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