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Relationship Discussion (non-explicit)
Reply to "My girlfriend only wants to spend Christmas with her family. I think this is so selfish. "
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[quote=Anonymous]My aunt was married to a man whose mother’s birthday was Christmas, and his whole family always celebrated Christmas with his mom. Now I have twins with a Christmas birthday, and although I would never require them to spend Christmas with me every year when they’re adults with families of their own, I’m not going to lie…I’d sure like to celebrate with them every year. Most people have to go to school or work on their birthday most years. People with Christmas birthdays never do. Their birthday becomes intertwined with all of the family traditions of celebrating the holiday. Their birthday isn’t better or more special than anyone else’s, but your girlfriend has probably never missed a single Christmas/dad’s birthday celebration in her whole life. My dad was healthy as a horse at 70. I wasn’t thinking that we didn’t have many years left with him, because his parents both lived to almost 90. However, my dad was 78 on his last Christmas before dying very suddenly and unexpectedly. That was Christmas of 2020, and we weren’t together because of the pandemic. The older her dad gets, the less amenable your girlfriend might be to spending Christmas without her dad. I definitely think you should be able to spend Christmas with your family too, but try not to be pissed with your girlfriend because that’s counterproductive to finding a happy compromise. Would girlfriend be willing to spend the night on Christmas Eve at her parents’ house, wake up there Christmas morning, wish dad a happy birthday and then fly from their city to your parents in time for Christmas dinner with them? Or the reverse, fly from your parents to her parents on Christmas Day? If she already has a dad who is 70, it won’t be too long until you will be taking turns hosting Christmas, and you can have both families over.[/quote]
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