Reply to Feeling different about my parent's divorce now as an adult....

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I think you should see a grief therapist.  Anger is one of the stages, and this seems like a classic deflection.  [/quote]

Correct.

I do not judge other people for what they do, because my marriage is a difficult one, and I have personal experience in abusive behavior and struggling to protect myself and my children. A parent should be close enough to their kids to be able to tell them at least some of the truth, even if that truth is hard to hear. I do not believe in hiding things just to "preserve the children's relationship with the other parent". That would be enabling a lie and could even prove dangerous for them, either with that parent or in the future, when dealing with similar people.
There are ways to telling the truth so that children understand that psychiatric or medical diagnoses can make well-intentioned people do terrible things. It's not "look at what your father did to me, he's a monster". It's "your father has X and Y diagnoses, and it makes him do A and B, and you should watch out for that, otherwise you will be hurt. Also in the future, if you see someone behave like that, maybe they have a similar diagnosis, and you have to be careful."

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