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[quote=Anonymous]That sounds hard! I have a couple thoughts:

If you think you might need to take her to a therapist start researching right now and getting on waitlists. A 2 month waitlist would be short/typical. You don’t have to do the appointments if you don’t need them.

So have you asked her what is going on from her perspective?  Does she hate wearing clothes and wants to be allowed to wander around with no pants?  I know she’s only 3 but my kid who was also bright and stubborn would really surprise me with her ability to explain herself at that age. Even if she can’t explain maybe she has some ideas about what would help. I really like how to talk so little kids will listen for kids this age. If she’s having big tantrums it does sound like there’s a power struggle to some extent. I’d try really hard to be super matter of fact about everything to try and work on that.

Also, my kid had ADHD and really did not know when she needed to go until very shortly before she was going to have an accident. When I had my younger child I realized how much easier it was - some kids have a much greater ability to recognize the signal before they have like 1 minute to make it to the toilet. My poor kid had accidents even at 5 if they were out on a far playground and she couldn’t make it back in time. So maybe focus on working on something 100 percent in her control- her ability to be taken to the toilet without a struggle. Maybe you focus on that for a while. A sticker chart or just lots of praise for improvement. That strategy might work even in preschool; both my kids schools had pretty regular potty schedules - maybe you will feel calmer if you know what they will and won’t do in the spring. [/quote]

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