Reply to How long did it take your parent(s) to pull the trigger on independent living?

Forum Index » Eldercare

Reply to "How long did it take your parent(s) to pull the trigger on independent living?"

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous]
When my mom fell and had a hip replacement, it was too much for them to go back to a townhouse on Cape Cod when siblings lived in Boston area.  So they moved to an independent living in a CCRC within 10 minutes of two brothers and in the area of three other siblings.
My dad had been able to provide care for my mother who had memory issues and being in a CCRC, she was able to move to memory care the final year of her life.  My dad was unusual in that he had cognitive skills intact until he passed a year ago a few months at 99. It did take my siblings putting down their foot that moving closer and to a more accessible place was necessary.  Dad did not like it in general because there were few men.  But he was always independent and did his local shopping, prepared healthy breakfast and lunch for them with one meal provided daily.  The daily check-in is also reassuring to relatives for those who will not wear a Medic Alert item.   He had his independence as he drove very locally until 98.  I will say having a unit with an outside patio or porch can be key to be sure a parent still got easy access to the outside and their mental health.

It is key to have one close if you can as one ages, there will be doctor visits to deal with, checking in on folks at a CCRC etc.  My folks had a good quality of life in their 90s due to the support provided by local siblings and this can take many shapes such as taking one out to their home, dropping by or taking out for breakfast or lunch, taking one out for a drive etc. or calling.  I remember when Covid hit, one brother would pick him up and go to a McDonald's drive-through, eat in the car and take dad on a drive through various sections of Boston, and I do not think he had ever been to McDonald's before, but how he raved about their fish sandwich!  So short answer is that it is better to have one transition to a new living situation - condo, apartment, CCRC etc. while one is in better health and can be engaged in the actual move.  Realistically, it was made while my mother was in rehab and choosing the place, furnishing it, setting it up within a week --- and it took all five locally to do this which, of course, is not the usual case.[/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics