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[quote=Anonymous]I'm in therapy for anxiety (not related to this, although this has been a recent focus). I just feel so angry and irritated with my MIL sometimes that sometimes I block her number just to not see her messages come through.

I grew up in a low income town, and we were fairly middle class. My MIL ironically also grew up poor, married rich, and they live a lavish lifestyle. Last-minute trips, constant talk about how she doesn't have to work, because they're wealthy enough, she just "likes to," yet she didn't work when my husband was younger because she didn't "want to," tells DH and I that our jobs are too demanding, and used to send us links to jobs paying $40K a year (I currently make $300K, DH makes about $250K and we support ourselves 100%). My parents had a tree fall on their house a few weeks ago and her first comment was, "Wow that must cost them a lot, I know that's expensive... how are they doing financially?" and just seems to make constant comments about money. Unrelated but my parents recently inherited a few million dollars (seriously) from my grandmother who passed away, and she still makes comments about my family "living on a shoestring" which I simply find offensive. This was over 2 years ago now, so obviously not worth saying anything now. I just hang onto her comments and can't let them go.

She has lived here in DC her entire life (grew up here), has no close friends (which I think is bizarre), and constantly waxes nostalgic about how when my DH and their daughter were babies, that was the time of her life.... still gives DH gifts related to his 6 year old birthday theme (seriously, we get something dragon-related for every. single. occasion). She goes to the park where they played and said she just spends hours thinking about when they were children and "smiling to herself." Since she's a therapist she also really likes to talk about her emotions, to which, DH and his father will just leave the room and walk away, so I know others get irritated with it as well. She's a big dreamer and she talks about buying a house in my hometown just because she "finds rural areas so authentic and quaint." She's just totally aloof and I find her behavior laughable, yet angering and patronizing.

Since my DS was born a couple of years ago, she has ramped up the nostalgic comments and I just find them totally grating to the point where I simmer on things days and weeks later. Add in that she lives such a whimsical, care-free life, she can't commit to being available at specific times to watch DS, and without fail, there is ALWAYS some sort of scheduling confusion, even if it's checking in (literally) 7 times to confirm the time, and then showing up an hour late. It's ridiculous, but I just hang onto these comments she makes and it makes me furious. This weekend, she was talking about getting a dog, just because my 2 year old says the word "dog" a million times. Will they ever get a dog? Absolutely not. She then must have said "Golden leaves, golden memories" about 5 times as she smiled and wiped her eyes, looking at our son. Her over the top cheesey/whimsical behavior is just so obnoxious, and I've totally inflated it in my head, that I stay angry about it.

I am working on this in therapy, but has anyone else ever dealt with a situation like this where ILs live locally? DH also works long hours so we don't see them very often, but she texts constantly, to the point I've blocked her number just so I don't have to see more stupid cheesey phrases and emoji hearts. I would love to hear how others have either gotten their anger/annoyance "down" and moved forward. It's just been a total fever pitch for the last couple years since having a child, although I always found her irritating. I now dread family holidays and actively think of ways to not see them.[/quote]

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