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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Geez! I don't understand why OP is being mocked for asking this question. I have noticed similar dynamics with my K DD and I opened this thread hoping to find some tips from parents who have BTDT. In general I'm fine with stepping back and letting kids work things out themselves, BUT this is also an age at which kids can really benefit from adult input to support their social/emotional development. If anyone has constructive suggestions for age-appropriate ways to help K/early elementary kids navigate jealousy and possessiveness in friendship groups, I would love to hear them. [/quote]

I'm 8:38. Yes, I think PPs are being unnecessarily harsh and OP asked an honest question. The thing is that it's impossible for DCUM to tell what's normal playground dynamics and when it crosses a line. Is it going on for weeks? Do any of the kids seem actually distressed by it? Is it actually happening as the K DD described? Don't forget that kids that age are notoriously unreliable narrators, and what could have been a 30 second passing conversation imprinted on her mind as a Big Deal. Or it could be that K DD is taking sides and unintentionally encouraging the behavior between the other girls. We did get a teacher involved in K when DD and another girl just couldn't stop pushing each other's buttons. They were hot and cold, but kept butting heads and just needed help to differentiate "she's disagreeing with me" from "she's being mean to me." We raised it briefly and objectively to the teacher (are you noticing this dynamic? Could you keep an eye out to see if what DD is saying at home meshes with actual reality?) and the teacher had a quick conversation with the girls and separated them for a week. They've been totally fine, though not easy BFFs, since then.

8:49 had good advice as well. K friendships can be brief but intense, or could be the start of years long close friendships. But regardless, emphasize that it's important to be kind to other kids, they should always include others (talk about the difference between including and excluding), and that they should take space and give space to others when they're having trouble getting along. Model and practice language they can use on the playground, tell them they can always go sit with a teacher if they need a break, and encourage them to play with different kids, not just their BFFs. And if things escalate, then ask the teacher to observe. A quick intervention from the teacher will go much further than armchair parenting from home. [/quote]

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