Reply to When is it ok to give up on wanting to be close to your only sibling?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Could he reasonably spin this that you are also not following up?

Bro: "hey wanna come to dinner Saturday?"
You: "YES, I'd love that, what time?"
Bro: silence
you: also silence

Scene?

Or do you respond after a day and say "Hey, I'm planning on coming for dinner, maybe at 6?  Does that work?"

I realize hounding him isn't great, but maybe just assume plans are on and make it VERY clear they are the ones who dropped the ball.  So, more like ask for a response CHANGING the plan, not confirming the plan.  "I'll see you Saturday at 6pm, I'll bring some wine.  Excited to see you!"  Then it's on him to say no to that.  Which is sounds like he won't do.[/quote]

OP here. Yes, that scenario has been accurate at times but “you: also silence” is IMO a total crock of crap. I’ve followed up and “hounded” to no avail, and what TF at this point am I expected to do to maintain a more active relationship? It seems clear to me that the answer is nothing. It is pretty damned exhausting to always be chasing, and if I “change the plan” to coerce communication it just - I won’t. It’s really a lot of mind-game shit that I’d then be initiating, no?

I posted in part because I’m ready to not respond to overtures at this point. I may be alone or ‘drama’ for this, but I’m just tired. This is not what I want, but I’m too old to be chasing people at this stage of my life. [/quote]

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