Reply to A friend regrets adopting her daughter

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I know someone who did this but after only 2 years.  The child had some developmental issues and they decided they didn't want to deal with it.  Heartbreaking. [/quote]

No you don't know anyone who did this - it's not possible to "give back" a child.  Who the hell do you think you are going to give the child back to???

When an adoption dissolution occurs, the family of the child must look to place the child in another adoptive home.  They can't just call the adoption agency and say "hey, take back this kid right now".  Adoption agencies don't run homes of any sort in the US.  And if the parents did make that call, the adoption agency would call CPS immediately to intervene and it would not be pretty for the family and this is especially true for those who have other children in the home.  And even if they are allowed to relinquish the child to the state (which is rare btw), the state finds another adoptive home for the child to go to (unless the situation is so severe that the child must be put in a residential setting)

[/quote]

You are wrong PP.  If a child is adopted through an agency, the agency will often, but not always, assist in finding temporary placements and then ultimately rehoming the child.  Agencies are also permitted by the courts to take custody of the child when the adoptive parents file with the court to terminate their parental rights.  You might find yourself surprised at the depth of resources some agencies have when it comes to adoption disruptions.

And, as far as it being heartbreaking, I don't see it that way.  If a family can't or won't care for a child, it's worse to force them to keep the child then to rehome the child.  [/quote]

No, I am not wrong and  we are saying the same thing. The agency does not take the child back but an agency will or may assist a family to find another family for the child to be adopted by. During that time though, the child remains in the home.  The child never "goes back" anywhere. The child moves on to another home.  Agencies are not going to take custody of a child because they don't have the resources to actually care for a child. Adoption agencies are administrative offices not homes that provide care.  By the time a parent goes to court to voluntarily relinquish they have already identified another family for the child to live in and the child has usually moved.[/quote]

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