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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP I have a similar sibling.  I put up with a lot of crap from him for years, but when he screamed in my face when I was pregnant I finally broke.  I rarely talk to him now.  And if I had to to coorondtae care I would keep it very business like.[/quote]

Thank you. Your response and the one from the poster before you seem sensible. I can keep them in my life enough to coordinate care.

My tension level increases a lot after I see them, so maybe I keep those in-person times more business like. I had caved to doing something sort of "fun" when we last had to meet. I wasn't yelled at but a lot of trauma and stress was sent my way, and I just don't need or want that anymore.

I've wanted to keep in touch so the kids could have a relationship, but I've started to crack.

Soon, the kids will be old enough to make their own decisions.

[/quote]

I’m the first poster who recommended keeping it business like.  Do you need to see them in person? That would be a good first step. Stop trying to do the fun family activities because they aren’t fun.  Do they have kids? If so, the kids may surprise you.  One of my children and my nephew are very close.  They talk through gaming and text daily.  Now with the internet, it’s surprising how those relationships can develop later on.  That’s also why it’s good to not completely cut people off.  That still doesn’t mean you have to have them physically around.  Sometimes my niece and nephews randomly text me too.  They are teens now.  Occasionally one of my daughters FaceTimes my sister to talk.  [/quote]

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