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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]This sibling has been cruel and mean to me most of my life. Out of nowhere, they sometimes start yelling at me, and they have done this to others, too. They frequently clash with my parents but our parents eventually “forget” and then act like something is wrong with me for being bothered by this behavior.

Lately, I’ve wondered if sibling is borderline. Our mother has major depressive disorder and anxiety and my therapist thought she sounded borderline, too.

On this board, the advice is to cut out toxic people. If I do that now with sibling, it will be hard to care for elderly parents. Mother is medicated and closer to normal these days so it’s not too awful with her at least.

After I see sibling, I feel depressed and horrible for about a day. They bring up their traumas when we are together. They say shocking things and they sometimes cry. It seems like they need me to feel their feelings. When they feel anxious, they call me and try to get me to calm them. I don’t want this role so I limit calls.

Since I won’t be cutting contact, I have gone low contact and do my best not to give them the reaction they crave. If I could cut contact, I would.

Any advice on how to disengage while seeing them so that I’m not depressed for a whole day afterward?

Having this sibling verbally attack me has caused me self confidence issues that I am trying to come back from, and it’s been bad for other areas of my life. [/quote]

Your sibling should seek a therapist. I wonder if your sibling's lashing out is a cry for help.[/quote]

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