Reply to Voices from future - what’s not on my radar now that should be?

Forum Index » Adult Children

Reply to "Voices from future - what’s not on my radar now that should be?"

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous]I have two grown DDs two years apart.  At your kids' ages, my kids were doing a lot of the same thing (same sport, same art class, etc)

When puberty hit--or whatever, a few years older--they went opposite directions. I think this is a developmental thing--it lowers the stress in the household if the two girls are not "competing" at the same thing.  Because if two kids are, for example, playing the guitar, one is going to be better...so I think they find their own things to be expert at.

Anyways, one kid got into makeup and clothes; the other kid wouldn't touch makeup and got into years of wearing gray T-shirts and black soccer shorts.  But the makeup/clothes one won't wear jewelry, so oddly the grunge one took over the necklace and earring-wearing.

Both had done basketball for years but that ended.  Both stayed athletic, but one got totally into indoor stuff--ballet, yoga, gym; the other got into running, surfing, hiking, kickboxing.

It's so weird--the indoor sport girl is sunscreen-obsessed so became super-pale with dark hair, and the outdoor girl has gotten incredibly dark with sunbleached hair, so unlike when little, they don't even look much alike anymore (and that's before you add the makeup and clothes)

So all this is just a way to say that as they get older, each will try to find their uniqueness in the household---and you can help or hinder this.  First, don't insist they do the same thing--most of the time, I've noticed, parents who force this, do it because it's convenient for THEM.

Second, I made sure with my words and actions that I did not accidentally create certain differences by noticing "pretty", or "smart" (as in, we do not have the pretty one and the smart one as the divide.  Or the athletic one and the non-athletic one).  We do have a bit of the humanities one and the STEM one, but that naturally came about that way.[/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics