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[quote=Anonymous]Glad we did the following for our kids -

Enrichment opportunities. Invested time to make sure that we fully utilized all the museums, aquariums, zoo, park, historic places etc that are available in and around DMV and took our kids on these trips almost every weekend.

Invested time and effort in their education.  Most of the times DH and I were figured out the curriculum of our public school and added to that. We tutored them ourselves as we could customize it to our kids needs. Regardless of how you teach your kids - yourself, through tutors or through a tutoring company - your kids need to have this kind of support outside of school. Don't expect the children to be self motivated. It is the parents job to guide them.

Mental health is very important. One of the stressors (there are many for kids) is academics. Teach your kids not to procrastinate and teach them  break up their work in manageable chunks. Learning to work a reasonable amount every day so that they are not panicking at the last minute is a valuable skill

Adequate sleep is crucial.  We made sure that they did not do late nights or all nighters.  Organizational and study skills have to be taught to your children by you. They do not learn it at school. You have to be patient and persistent and your close involvement is very important.

Extra Curricular. We exposed them to many EC opportunities and when they identified what they really liked to do, we made sure that they had the opportunities to immerse themselves in it.

No Social Media. We really curtailed the social media footprints of our children by not having a big social media presence ourselves and by explaining to them in a very transparent way what can happen to their lives through social media.  This prevented a lot of teen angst, being victims of internet trolling and bullying, kept their noses clean for college applications, and prevented a major time suck for them.

Healthy eating habits.  We made them food literate and gave them a huge choice of home cooked organic foods. My kids love variety, veggies and fruits.

Health.  Kids are very health conscious and they advocate for themselves. We taught them how to get the most from their well visits and to be proactive in getting help if they need it for any physical or mental issues. We also taught our kids to get on the treadmill every day. Yes, it is considered bad form to get the kids on treadmill when they are in MS (gasp) and kids should get all physical exercise through play, but we also realized that that was not really happening consistently with our children because of busy schedules, weather issues, most of their playmates  being busy with video games etc.  My kids were using the treadmill, recumbent bike, rowing machine, weights, elliptical from the time they were in early MS.

Sex Education. Frank, age appropriate and transparent conversation about reproduction, sex, dating, gender identity, protecting their hearts, grooming behavior, porn, STD, consent etc. It was reinforced by health ed at school in ES, MS and HS but my kids talk with me about all concerns about sex and sexual health.

Financial literacy.  They know enough about credit cards, budgeting, maxing out retirement, using index funds, getting employers match, compound interest etc.

Participate. We made sure that the kids had a diverse group of friends and that they showed up for things at school and in their friend's lives.  Things like school games, birthday parties, homecoming, prom etc. Our kids did not date till late in the college but they had a lot of friends. We also made sure that our own social network was large and that they were also exposed to socializing with all age groups - family, friends, neighbors etc.  We knew most of the parents of their friends from K-12 at least.

Reciprocation. We taught them how to be good hosts and guests because we socialize and entertain a lot at home. My kids were super comfortable organizing and hosting parties at college. Dating was not allowed until they went to college and because they were so very busy with their academics, ECs. travelling and socializing that we did not have any boyfriend, girlfriend drama.

Here is where we did not do a good job -

Earning a dollar, managing their money. My kids did not have a summer job or allowance.  We pretty much bought them everything they needed or wanted. Mainly because they are sensible and frugal kids who are a bit nerdy, we did not have any problems with that. There are pros and cons to this. We never had issues with vaping, drugs, gambling etc because they did not have money that was not accounted for. 
They did not have to ever budget for anything and they knew we would pay entirely for college and living expenses.  BUT, I think that kids who earn and manage their own money are savvier than the kids who do not and have a better idea of what it takes to get by in life.  As an aside - my kids chose our instate flagship with generous merit aid and so we saved the money that we had set aside for college, so I am not really criticizing them.  But I will reiterate that there is great value in being able to earn a dollar.

Chores.  Our kids did not have any chores because they had a hectic schedule and heavy course loads.  I was a SAHM with a lot of help and so there were never any chores that they had to do.  I found myself giving them a crash course in adulting before they went to college. Teach your kids to do their laundry and fold their clothes. Teach them to iron. Teach them to cook.  Teach them to clean the kitchen and bathroom. My kids did make their beds every day and put their dishes in the dishwasher.  Still important to teach them these skills because they need to learn how to live on their own earnings not their parents earnings.

Our native language.  I messed up because DH and I are bilingual and did not speak with our children in our native tongue. They ended up learning English, German and Spanish, but not our native tongue.

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