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[quote=Anonymous]Yes, I feel better, but it's complicated. I had a emotional hangover every time I visited or called. Sometimes she behaved via text, but eventually the nastygram came. I gradually kept stepping back and setting more boundaries and she got worse and worse. Finally a health crisis in my own life forced me to set the ultimate limit that i will no longer tolerate any of her manipulations. She did it again and that was it.

I spent the first few weeks terrified she would unleash a fury on me like I had never seen either showing up at my door or sending a certified letter. Once I went long enough with my front door, my mailbox and my text-messages being safe spaces again, I could breathe. I slept through the night. It had been years since I slept through the night. I thought getting up to pee was a middle age thing, but for me it was stress. Now most nights I sleep. I get to sleep easier too. I can see now from a distance just how disturbed and abusive my mother is. I wonder how I endured it all for so long. I get fewer migraines. I think my immune system functions better.

It's sad, but it was sad and disturbing when we were in contact. It's healthier for my family and I am better wife and parent not having to keep dealing with abuse.

I recall seeing posts about how disturbing it is so many people get therapy and take meds. I disagree. What is disturbing is people like my mother who refuse to get help for their mental health issues. I could finally stop therapy when I went NC with her,.[/quote]

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