Reply to SIL left our door open while we were out of town- no apology. Should I say something to her?

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Reply to "SIL left our door open while we were out of town- no apology. Should I say something to her?"

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP, you said she had not apologized or even said anything about the door being open.

Yes, most of us, when your DH called to ask, would have said, "I don't recall leaving it open but I'm sorry! I hope everything was OK." I get that you want that and she should have apologized. One should apologize for an accident that happens on one's watch, so to speak.

But your post sounds incredibly infuriated, considering nothing was stolen/damaged/rain didn't pour inside/animals didn't infest the house. I'm thinking you're not as angry about the door being open as about your SIL being the one who was there when it happened, since you and she are, let's say, not close. Would you have as visceral a reaction of pure anger if, for instance, some relative of your own whom you like a lot had been the house guest? Ask yourself that.

Again, I think most people would be appalled at themselves if there were even a possibility they left a door open or left it unbolted and it blew open and stayed that way. But you can't control her feelings about it. You can only control your own reaction, and your reaction may be about more than just this door. You can let this boil inside you or you can step back, take a breath, and be grateful that nothing worse happened. I'd be upset too -- my DH left our basement exterior door standing wide open for a whole day recently and animals could have come in etc. -- but all you can DO about it is check carefully after the fact.

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Op here. I intentionally mentioned that we are not close to give the full honest picture. So of course I agree that my anger here is exacerbated. I can own up to that. If my sibling did the same thing and didn’t even attempt to show concern or take inkling of responsibility- yea I would be frustrated too! But it’s hard to imagine. Even thogiht I don’t care for her, if SIL simply got on the phone, sent a text or an email saying “thanks for letting me stay there. Sorry about the door!” This would be a non issue. I would think she was careless and absentminded, but I’d be over it.

And for the record this is someone in her 40s, not teenager. She should know better.[/quote]

And? So what's next? Decide not to let her stay there again: check. Keep fuming, or move on with your day? Which one are you going to check?[/quote]

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