Reply to OP from an earlier thread back with an update.

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[quote=Anonymous]I am the OP of this thread: https://www.dcurbanmom.com/jforum/posts/list/1060613.page

Yesterday we took our 4 month old in for her checkup. We drove separately as he met us there from work. Afterwards we agreed he would take the baby home and I would pick up dinner for us.

I forgot my wallet, so I drove home to get it. When I got there, I found him smoking weed in the backyard. He immediately tried hiding his joint and ran into the house via a different entrance to try and hide from me.

I told him to go take a shower. I went upstairs to check on the baby and she wasn’t in her crib. I screamed “where’s the baby” thinking he may have left her in the car. Turns out she was with him while he was smoking - he couldn’t even bother to put her in her crib while he smoked, he left her in her car seat and just took her out with him.

Smoking around the baby is a hard no for me. I’ve asked him to move out and relinquish custody since he does not make good decisions when she is in his care. I don’t know if he will agree, and I know legally this will be hard to get.

I am getting the usual reaction addicts have when caught - the crying, the theatrics, asking for help, promises of rehab and meetings (do they even have rehab for weed?). During dinner he kept shaking his head to himself and putting his head in his hands. It all felt very dramatic and contrived. I’m frustrated with this as I know it is only because he got caught. Had I not come home early, he would not be asking me for help or trying to change.

I am very angry because I have been shouldering ALL of the burden at home while he worked through his depression, to the point where I have had to seek my own mental health treatment from being completely overwhelmed and having a break down because I can’t do it all. And now it is quite obvious to me “depression” was actually “withdrawal” and this entire time I have been doing everything so he could keep up his weed habit. I’m so angry. So, so, SO angry.

Thank you to everyone who responded with kindness and help in my earlier thread. [/quote]

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