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[quote=Anonymous]I'd just take it on a case by case basis.

Late drop off/pick up -- you have to decide if this is worth the convenience of her doing it. She is unlikely to get better at it. But if this is the hardest thing to outsource, it might be worth it to just deal with the kids being late for a while. Maybe start working towards your kids being more independent on this front -- can they take buses on their own? ride bikes? Maybe this is a problem that will resolve itself in a year or two.

Forgetting items -- agree with PP that you need to teach the kids to be responsible for this themselves. A preteen can remember their water bottle and apply sunscreen.

You know what help I might invest in, that might have the most longterm benefit? An organizer. Find someone who will come in and streamline your routines and landing areas to facilitate all the stuff. Or look online an do it yourself, but I get you are understandable overwhelmed at the moment. But a lot of this stuff would be easier for the kids and your mom if you just had rock solid systems in place. an alarm that rings when it's time to pick up Larla from soccer. Color coordinated bags with labels. Landing areas for labels for activities and school. Say it's for the kids but it's for your mom too. And you!

It doesn't sound like we're talking about serious declines here. She's not forgetting a child altogether, having trouble driving (but keep in mind that's coming), or getting into interpersonal conflicts. But the lying is a sign that she's starting to slip and is probably doing a bit of tap dancing to cover it up. I think it's fine to keep leaning on her for a bit while you figure out this big change in your life, but be aware of her limitations.[/quote]

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