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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]You were codependent. You were not helping her. Detach with love and let her figure out when she is finally ready to get professional help.[/quote] I want to know- was there a way to help her without being codependent? Was I the problem?[/quote] No, it sounds like she elicits this response in people. But you have to have strong boundaries with her, even though I imagine she demands all or nothing.[/quote] It made me wonder when the other family member was helping out a lot- in terms of time and generous gifts, but did not seem to mind at all. Like taking many days off work to help them. And seemed to have ACTUALLY helped them although it was slow going and took a long time. Often when I help I feel like it is futile or I get frustrated when there seems to be an obstacle at every corner or reason why that won’t work, and I get burned out and frustrated fairly quickly. [/quote]
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