Reply to What do you do if someone is absurdly jealous of where you live?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I think you’re both taking those comments too personally and incorrectly assuming they come from a place of jealousy.   It’s just small talk.  It’s not a reflection on you.  It’s probably simply true, they couldn’t handle the traffic or living in a small NYC apartment.  Who cares?  It’s chatter.  Not a big deal.   If you’re content with your life, the inane comments of others won’t bother you.  [/quote]

I choose to live in the city and have a lot of friends in this suburbs who sometimes say negative things about living in the city (i.e. traffic, cost of housing, lack of certain amenities, schools, etc.). I consider their comments a little rude but I don't take them personally at all. After all, I assume if they really wanted to live here, they would. I understand there are tradeoffs to living one place over another and where people choose to live is highly personal. So it's not upsetting or insulting to me that some of my friends dislike where I live.

If someone was harping on it all the time, I'd probably just choose to spend less time with them because that sounds boring and unnecessarily negative.

But the odd random comment about "ugh, I don't know how you can deal with the traffic/homelessness/schools" doesn't really bug me. I don't have trouble dealing with those things because I like where I live and feel the upsides far outweighs the downsides. It's a nonissue.

I think you might feel a bit insecure about your choices and feel the need to defend them. Why? Also, your comment about them living in some "far flung suburb" or indicating that they are jealous because you live in areas that are expensive to live in... that indicates to me that you might actually be instigating these conflicts by acting superior and causing THEM to defend where they live by pointing out the problems with where you live. If you run into this problem often, I would ask yourself if you are frequently bragging about your homes or neighborhoods in a way that is creating conflict with others, especially people who might not be as well off as you. People naturally tend to feel defensive about financial status and being a jerk about your wealth is a good way to make enemies of them.[/quote]

OP here - this gives me some thought. I’ll keep it in mind for the future thank you. [/quote]

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