Reply to Mentally Ill Sister Having a Baby

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[quote=Anonymous]There really isn't much you can do. If she is abusing or neglecting the child you can see if she'll let you have guardianship (contact a family lawyer to see what the options are in your state) and decide if you'd be willing to take the child if he or she comes into foster care. If your sister lives in a different state from you expect things to be extra complicated.

Try to stay close to your sister and her child--if your sister is willing, babysit or visit or have them visit you (and eventually maybe host the child for some school breaks or other time).

I know people who have had mentally ill parents. Some were raised by them the whole time, others went into foster care or were informally cared for by relatives or family friends. One thing they all have in common is that they love their moms. They recognize the flaws and weirdnesses in their upbringing but it's still their mom and they don't need someone talking down about her. So even if your niece or nephew eventually realizes that her mom was unusual or not a great parent, there is likely to be a lot of love there and not denying it or downplaying it--while also acknowledging the things the child eventually identifies as unusual--is very helpful. But it's not your job to point out the weirdness. Just love the kid and provide support where you can.[/quote]

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