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[quote=Anonymous]12 year old wants to change custody to spend more time with you? Because she’s found out something bad about her mom?

TAKE THE HIGH ROAD.

Tell her you love her, tell her the circumstances of the end of your marriage have absolutely nothing to do with her or her relationship with her mom or how much her mom loves her. Tell her you’re sorry she’s dealing with this and you know it’s hard. Then tell her you’re sure she and her mom will be able to work through it, but they can only do it if she’s there. You’ll see her the next time she’s supposed to come to your house per the regular custody arrangement. Hug her and leave.

When you get home, email/text your ex, tell her you’re sorry she’s having to deal with this, let her know that you have her back, and ask if there’s anything you can do to make this more smooth for her and your daughter since your daughter’s relationship with both her parents is such a high priority for you both.

She’s 12. She WILL do this again. When the shoe is on the other foot and she’s mad at you and doesn’t want to see you, isn’t this what you’d want your ex to do?

BTDT

—child of 50/50 custody whose parents got this right[/quote]

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