Reply to Feeling guilty about past PPA/PPD

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[quote=Anonymous]Just wondering if anyone can relate. I’m newly postpartum with third baby, and it’s a big difference from my postpartum time with 2nd baby. I think I’m realizing I may have had mild PPA or PPD with 2nd. I have a lot more help this time, my mood is calmer, my expectations are lower, our family seems less stressed - it’s just so different from the situation with baby 2.

The thing I’m really thinking about is I feel very guilty about how I treated my first child (daughter) when DS2 was born. My daughter was 2.5 at the time. I was just so frustrated with her, and she was clearly traumatized by having a new sibling. I see now that her reaction was very different to how she and my son (also now 2.5) are reacting to this third baby. When 2nd baby was born, my daughter had all these regressions, was so clingy, threw tantrums. I just had so much trouble dealing with it and I did yell at her a few times and overall I see now I just expected way too much from her as a toddler. I understand now how young a 2 yo is, but at the time, I think I thought of her more like a preschooler. Like I gave her a laptop to watch a movie on while I tried to put the baby down for a nap, but she would touch the laptop and stop the movie then come into my son’s room and interrupt me putting him down, and I would get mad at her and yell at her for touching the laptop.

Anyway, I guess I’m just sort of confessing / wondering if anyone has a similar experience? My daughter is 5 now and I would say she is totally fine and happy and we have a great relationship. I just feel bad for being mean to her when she was 2/3 and I had a new baby at home. She really loves the new baby (baby 3).[/quote]

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