Reply to Affair recovery and staying together?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I listened. Really listened. My husband eventually admitted to me that having affairs is rooted in childhood issues (mainly fear of abandonment - his mother left his father and him when he was only 3) and that knowing he can always attract someone else makes him feel secure. It's not ideal for me as his wife, but at least I understand. And having gone through some serious trauma myself as a child, I'm more inclined to be understanding about him doing what he needs to do in order to feel secure.

Interestingly the outcome of all this was that he started to trust me more - he was open with me about his fears, I didn't leave him or try to change him and I really tried to understand and accept him. And as he trusted me more he had less need to have affairs. I know he still has the occasional one night stand, but it is nothing like it used to be and we are overall doing pretty well in our marriage.[/quote]

Wow. So you just look the other way now? I hope he is at least safe. [/quote]

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