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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]
My money is my husband's money and vice versa. We tell each other when we spend it. I haven't had to do this myself, but my husband is a Vietnamese war refugee and has always sent money back to his home country, to support the descendants of relatives who were stuck there. Currently he and his brothers are paying for law school for one of their nieces, whom they've never even met in person! I don't even know to whom the rest of the money goes, but they send the money to their mother, who sends a large check to Vietnam.

It seems you and your husband are not a team here. You should be. Don't be scared or ashamed. This is a totally legitimate and morally-appropriate expense.[/quote]

No, it is throwing money into an indefinite black hole. [/quote]

Sorry, but if the parents in question have sacrificed for their kids and were loving, decent, people, your comment is rather shocking. Kids are a massive expense too, you know. Are you going to tell them that at 18, they're on their own? This reasoning is fallacious because it doesn't factor in love, respect and a sense of gratitude.

The rub comes when you're trying to balance saving for retirement, for college and supporting elderly parents. Obviously there are hard choices to make. But morally, it's a given that if there's money to help them, loving and caring parents should be helped.
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