Reply to My mother just told me that she will pray that God will strike me down and that I will die

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Reply to "My mother just told me that she will pray that God will strike me down and that I will die"

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[quote=Anonymous]I’m a hospice chaplain, OP.  I see so much Alzheimers and Dementia both in home and in our inpatient facility.  My suggestion is to find a caregivers support group asap.  That will help more than you know.  You might also look into respite type programs that will keep her for a few hours several times a week.  You need to find a way to take care of yourself.

Most importantly,  remember that this is not your mom talking.  It’s really difficult to internalize this.  But, your mom is not aware of her words or of how they affect you.  She cannot control them.  She may remember some and feel regret.  But at the time, she has no idea what she is communicating.  Sometimes it helps to view Alzheimers patients the way you would a young child.  You would never treat them like children, of course.  But assume toddler level emotional regulation.

My MIL has Alzheimers.  I’ve known her since I was 16. We have always had a close, loving relationship.  She called me a bi7ch yesterday.  And it stung.  It’s not her.  It’s the Alzheimers.  And it just sucks.  I’m really sorry you are struggling.  Unfortunately, it only gets worse as time passes. Take steps now to protect your mental health and that of your family. Start researching long term care facilities.  At some point, she may become more than you can physically manage.  Talk to her doctor about anti-anxiety meds.  They can be especially helpful late in the afternoon.[/quote]

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