Reply to Is my DH being honest with me? Do I need to worry about him losing interest?

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[quote=Anonymous]When I met my DH, I was at the thinnest I've ever been, thanks to obsessive exercise and a borderline eating disorder. It was unhealthy physically and mentally. I suffered a sport injury after we'd been together about a year, and I also really struggled with my self-esteem. I gained about 10 lbs while rehabbing that injury (some of it surely muscle gain but also just getting back to a more sustainable weight), and then another 10 over the next few years. Not like massive weight gain, and I was exercising and doing a lot of strength training so I wasn't getting unhealthy. I was probably just moving to what is a more healthy natural weight for me -- closer to what my weight was like before I'd lost all the weight loss, but also much stronger and more fit all around.

Part of why I was able to do this is my DH was super supportive. He knew about my insecurities and eating issues and really encouraged me to be healthy. He made me feel loved and desired at a higher weight. It was really great and it helped me finally get over a lot of the negative self talk I'd had for years.

Cut to several years later. I had a baby, and unsurprisingly, the baby weight did not melt off. My body has changed. I look a lot more like I did back in my 20s -- like I'm carrying 20-25 extra pounds, and not like someone who is in great shape but naturally a bit bigger.

My DH doesn't compliment my body like he used to, but he's not critical. He was very supportive during and after my pregnancy. We both love food AND exercise, and he's supportive in me continuing to eat a pretty normal (i.e. not restrictive) diet and also encourages me to exercise.

But I also can't help but notice that he is REALLY into women who have bodies like I used to have. Both the way I looked when we met (thin, very fit, boobs) and how I was pre-baby (curvy, very fit, big boobs). I wonder if he's unhappy with how my body has changed. I don't think he'd ever say anything, but I just don't get the positive feedback I once did. It's been over 3 years since my baby was born and I'm not sure I'm every getting back to where I was.

Do I need to worry about this. He's a very visual guy and a lot of our attraction was based on him thinking I was smoking hot all through our dating years and the early part of our marriage. I'm looking more like a middle aged lady every day. He pretty much looks the same. Am I crazy for being stressed about this?[/quote]

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