Reply to How can I stop being the forgotten “friend”?

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[quote=Anonymous]You need to take the initiative. I'm an introvert just like you, and I've had years of experience in many different social circles, both good and bad. The ones where I've succeeded were always once where I took the initiative and organized things myself.

You have to get over the fear of asking people to do things. I've planned events where no one came - it's really ok. People are busy and flaky and it's not personal. Try a few times, then move on.

I'll give you just a couple examples. I moved to a new city, as a new mom, didn't know anyone. I organized a donation drive for baby supplies, advertised it online. Exchanged numbers with a woman who dropped off some diapers because she seemed cool. Asked her to do a playdate. She rescheduled/bailed a couple of times. I asked again. We hung out and ultimately became great friends for a number of years.

Just recently, I tried to start a book club (new city, no friends). Organized a group of women online via a FB group. Despite initial excitement, no one came to the first one. I tried again, one other woman came. We had so much fun and she asked to do it again. I followed up with a couple of others and they said they'd come next time.

Oh, and as for making a group. I successfully did this a couple times by making several individual friends and introducing them to each other over time. [/quote]

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