Reply to Anyone have a good friend or relative who went to prison for something serious?

Forum Index » Off-Topic

Reply to "Anyone have a good friend or relative who went to prison for something serious?"

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]My DH's good friend went to prison for rape.  [b]I met the guy on the night before he was to be sentenced and I joined DH for a "good bye" dinner.  It was weird[/b].

Anyway, I didn't want anything to do with this guy (I think he was probably intoxicated and must have forced his russian internet wife into sex.... he didn't seem like the testosterone-driven violent type.  I believe he did it based on what the judge said at the hearing but the guy was in COMPLETE denial.)  He got six years.  During those six years, he would call our house.  Many times, I would answer the phone and hear the automated voice saying there was a collect call from the ... state prison.  I knew who it was and certainly didn't want to talk to him, but I also felt akward hanging up on a guy in prison (who my husband considered to be a good friend).  DH actually visited him a time or two when he was on work travel in the same state.  Things in common dwindled.  I think he visited once at our house (which I was opposed to), but the emails and communication have basically ceased.

I think there is something to be said for being charitable with your time and being compassionate even to those who have done serious wrongs.  However, over time, I think it is likely you will have less in common and less desire to communicate.  Just be careful not to get manipulated or pulled into something with this person in jail. The incarcerated person has every reason to keep you close -- you are his lifeline -- but you don't owe this person anything.  Try to set out some boundaries in your mind now.... i.e. one phone call per month.  One email per month....or letters at bday and Xmas... decide what you are comfortable doing without getting dragged into someone else's drama.  Compassion === yes.  Sucker == no.[/quote]

What was the goodbye dinner like? Did you talk about going to prison or not? [/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics