Reply to Well Intentioned…but goodness gracious

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[quote=Anonymous]Anyone else’s spouse do more harm than good sometimes when trying to “parent”? Where they just end up making unhelpful, or worse, harmful statements to their kids? Example, as spouse is explaining the importance of consistent, hard work, DD responds, “I know, I’m good at math but I could do better if I practiced more.” And spouse says, “No, you’re not good at math. And you know why? Because you don’t put forth the effort.”

Now, mind you, DD is getting A’s and some B’s in math. She is ‘good’ at math, but she could do better. I think my spouse in speaking this way to DD is chipping away (or worse, wholesale undermining) her confidence. How do I approach spouse without making them defensive? I don’t want to attack, but just point out alternative ways to approach DD. Not interested in starting a fight or coming off as ‘I know more than you’. I just happened to observe an interaction and I have an opinion about THAT specific interaction and not spouse’s overall parenting.[/quote]

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