Reply to Spouse will not respect my need for sleep

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Just to be clear, you are talking about 1-1.5 hours’ difference between when you go to bed and when she does. I agree that it is inconsiderate that she makes noise and turns on lights while you are sleeping, but given that it’s her room too, I think it is also inconsiderate of you to require that she come to bed silently and in the dark. Where is she supposed to shower and brush her teeth if not in her bathroom?

I would try again with sleep masks and headphones. Maybe it doesn’t work great for you, but it seems reasonable that if you are asking her to come to bed in a way that doesn’t disturb you that you should try to be as difficult to disturb as possible given that she also has needs and is entitled to use her own bathroom for normal stuff.

If the routine just isn’t working for you anymore, talk about that. Moving to guest room is an option. Synchronizing bedtime is an option. But right now you are both expecting the other to just do what you want without compromising at all. That’s not a solution. [/quote]
C’mon.  It’s common courtesy to be quiet in the bedroom when your partner is sleeping.  That’s true for the person last to bed and the first person awake.  Op’s wife could close the bathroom door so her spouse wouldn’t have to deal with the light and noise.

Op, in your shoes I’d just go to the guest room.  Maybe try talking to her first.  It sounds like you’ve tried that though and she doesn’t want to hear it.  [/quote]

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