Reply to People who are really good at deflecting responsibility

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[quote=Anonymous]I had a serial cheater ex.  It all blew up when I stumbled across proof of the cheating.  Ex wanted to maintain the relationship, so I insisted on psychiatric treatment with access to treating doc for me.  During therapy in an individual session with me, the psychiatrist said he was trying to narrow the diagnosis between psychopath and sociopath.  We I discussed the various components and which diagnosis was a better fit.

All this is a long way of saying that some people do not feel the pain of others and as such feel no empathy or real guilt. They are very instrumental or transactional in their relationships with others because they do not have feelings based on what others may feel, except feelings that have to do with themself - whether the structure around them makes them appear as a good person (which they like and feel good about) or a bad person (which they don’t like).  But rather than change their behavior, they change the narrative around their behavior.

It’s reflects very disordered behavior/personality.  My now exDH grew up in a family with an alcoholic and mentally ill mother, and he himself is mentally ill. He is good at masking, but underneath there is a lot of secretive, compartmentalized behavior. [/quote]

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