Reply to Made plans for thanksgiving and now IL’s want me to come to their home.

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[quote=Anonymous]My husband is gone for work this Thanksgiving. I’m Canadian so US Thanksgiving doesn’t hold a whole lot of weight for me, but I do get two days off which is nice.

We have a 2.5 year old son and I will be travelling with him across the border for the next 5 days to visit my parents. I ordered a small thanksgiving dinner for my son and I from Whole Foods. We will be doing a turkey trot 1K the day after thanksgiving.

My IL’s just called and invited us to their house. I told them I had plans and had already ordered a meal. They seem to think this is sad and that my son and I "can’t be alone on thanksgiving." I reiterated that I really didn’t want the food to go to waste and they said to just bring it over.

The issue is they’re all very heavy drinkers and my SIL, BIL and her two school-aged children are all not vaccinated. I’m trying to be polite here and told my IL’s I won’t be coming because we already have plans but that answer isn’t good enough and they’re insisting they stop by after dinner because they haven’t seen my son in a while. This is really petty but I have gone to my IL’s house for years for thanksgiving and they’re terrible cooks - half of the meal is canned or comes from a box. I’m really looking forward to a restaurant made meal with my son at home in our pajamas.

This is frustrating to me because I already made plans and am very happy with what were doing. Im irritated that I’m expected to maintain relationships with my IL’s when my husband is gone. I really don’t want to expose my son to unvaccinated groups of people who will undoubtedly want to hug and play with him. But they don’t know any boundaries and I’m trying to set mine but they’re really not respecting my plans.

I’m also just tired. I’ve been doing the single mom thing since my husband has been gone for work. I’m a social worker and we are so low staffed; I want to spend my time off doing things with my son that we enjoy.

I just really don’t know how to talk my in laws we won’t be coming without offending them or causing a ruffle.[/quote]

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