Reply to How do you motive a child who always seeks approval

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]She needs to find her intrinsic motivation. She needs to do well for the sake of teaching herself how to write a well-written paper. She needs to study and learn material so she knows it later in life, not so she can get praised by the teacher in front of the whole class for getting the highest grade. Explain that to her. Teach her to look for personal satisfaction in a job well done, thoroughly done. [/quote]

Agree.  However, your DD is emotional and it is difficult to "reason" with emotions.

And, it is possible that her friend deserved the "A."  Maybe the friend is just a very good natural writer.  Or, maybe your DD overthought the assignment and that it did not require all those hours.  Perhaps, the teacher did not see the assignment as being important enough to demand hours of work.

"Balance" is key here.

Be sure your DD is taking time for recreation.  There is nothing wrong with wanting to make good grades.  Just be sure the goal is to "do her best" not to "be the best."[/quote]

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