Reply to Father's obligations towards child

Forum Index » General Parenting Discussion

Reply to "Father's obligations towards child"

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Would really appreciate some insight.
My husband and I share a baby girl together and he also has a teenage daughter from a previous marriage who lives in Europe with her mom
I'll keep it short - he pays child support to his previous wife (obligation) but over the years has also paid for extravagant shopping trips, holidays etc 
A lot of it has been excessive which he admits. His reason is if he doesn't do that the daughter will not talk to him- ongoing issue since she was a child. The teenager has no interest in our daughter and has never asked about her. In all fairness she barely has an interest in her own father unless a birthday or Christmas are nearby then the wish lists pour in. He is too scared to say anything as he knows she will not speak to him.
Anyhow the issue we have is he hasn't paid for a single thing for our 8 month old daughter. I have purchased everything she owns as well as paid for the nanny etc. I also pay for groceries and household foods and no we don't have a joint account and nor do I want one.
Despite him earning triple figures he says he pay the mortgages ( we have a renovation that I have contributed too as well) and therefore doenst need to pay for anything else.
[b]The mortgage has never stopped him paying for his other daughter.[/b]
What is the best way to approach this? If he doesn't want to buy our daughter things that's fine but atleast help with the childcare costs? Or is that on me too as its more around my job?[/quote

Are you saying he pays the mortgage on his daughter in Europe's house as well as shopping trips, holidays, etc?  Or you're saying that he pays the mortgage where you and your daughter live, and that has not stopped him from paying for things for his other daughter?

Honestly, your situation makes no sense to me.  If you don't have/want joint accounts, how do you handle your finances?  He covers the mortgage and you cover everything else?  Because if so, he's not doing anything wrong.  If you normally split the bills 50/50 and he's refusing to put in 50% on anything to do with your daughter, you have big problems.

Is he a good dad?  Does he take care of the baby, bond with her, put in time and effort?  If not, then I can see using dollars as a proxy (like he does with his older daughter).  If he is a good dad, but that is not satisfactory unless he proves his love with money, it seems like he just married a version of his older daughter.[/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics