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Relationship Discussion (non-explicit)
Reply to "Incapable and Defensive Spouse"
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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]It sounds like classic ADHD to me. And the way I treat my son with ADHD is to praise the hell out of him when he gets it right. It is so much more effective than pointing out the mistakes. Trust me.[/quote] Or classic high functioning autism. Brain can’t handle more than one thing, doesn’t multitask unless vitally important and for external people (ie getting fired or job reputation). Keep a log so you know how pervasive the pattern is. If adhd meds can help, if aSD maybe an executive functioning coach or behavioral therapy. But early intervention is the only way to avoid bad habits and defensive attitudes. At age 40 it’s Unf pretty ingrained. He’s in over his head w adult responsibilities and is going to get nasty about it. [/quote] Piling on to say this is exactly my ADHD spouse. Meds helped - he's more functional AND less frustrated.[/quote]
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