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[quote=Anonymous]OP, just mental hugs for you. I am in the same boat and sometimes feel the same way. The biggest thing for me is to just let myself feel the grief and sadness and not to push it away. I sometimes start to feel very angry if I don't allow myself to grieve, especially because my child's loss the last year and a half wasn't only due to Covid but also to political issues in this area that led to the prolonged closures. I know I'd feel differently if ever child in the world had the same loss. But they didn't.

Something I try to focus on is what my child gained during that year that would have been hard if she had been in school. She and I did lots of hiking last year, on weekdays when the trails were quiet. I'm not normally a very outdoors person and I don't know if I would have pushed a 5 year old to do that otherwise, but the weirdness of the pandemic and having her home spurred me to do it and now we have a lot of memories of that, plus we still enjoy going hiking. That is something that wouldn't have happened had she been in kindergarten.

I am sure you have things like that in your life too. Maybe your kids got to spend more time together in a way that helped them build some closeness. Maybe your son slept better last year without having to get up and get ready for school at a specific time. There must be something gained from this experience. See if you can find it and focus on that when those feelings of grief come up. But also, it's okay to feel the loss. No, it may not be as bad as childhood cancer, but that doesn't mean it doesn't matter or count. It does.[/quote]

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