Toggle navigation
Toggle navigation
Home
DCUM Forums
Nanny Forums
Events
About DCUM
Advertising
Search
Recent Topics
Hottest Topics
FAQs and Guidelines
Privacy Policy
Your current identity is: Anonymous
Login
Preview
Subject:
Forum Index
»
Off-Topic
Reply to "Why am I all but ghosted by grieving friends?"
Subject:
Emoticons
More smilies
Text Color:
Default
Dark Red
Red
Orange
Brown
Yellow
Green
Olive
Cyan
Blue
Dark Blue
Violet
White
Black
Font:
Very Small
Small
Normal
Big
Giant
Close Marks
[quote=Anonymous]I can’t speak for your friends, but when I was grieving, I was basically a walking zombie. Trying to think coherently took a lot of effort. Driving safely and taking care of my kids left little room for anything else. Your gift card train was thoughtful and remarkably generous, but in the chaos, somebody else might have gone through condolence messages and shuffled with money to grandma, or other family member. Everybody tries their best, but there’s a lot to coordinate and nobody’s functioning well. I’m sure your gift was helpful. I’m sure your friend appreciates your concern and support, but may not be aware that you are directly responsible for all $800 of gift cards. I don’t know how long ago their losses were, or the depth of their pain, but it can take a long time to get close to anything approximating normal, and even then there’ll be good days and bad days. It sounds like the friend who reached out, is making an attempt, but may just not be ready. Some people are better, in general, of staying in touch. Adding in grief makes it worse for everyone. Your friend may not have been up to keeping in touch initially, and when they eventually start to emerge from their grief, they may feel guilty and think it’s too late to reach out. I suggest you continue reaching out, low-key, on an occasional basis (maybe once or twice a year). I don’t know if you’re being too much, but you are certainly being a lot. I think it’s very kind, and you have a good heart, but keep in mind they’re probably going to feel shell-shocked and in survival mode for a while and may not have any resources to notice anything outside of what’s needed immediately to get through each day. [/quote]
Options
Disable HTML in this message
Disable BB Code in this message
Disable smilies in this message
Review message
Search
Recent Topics
Hottest Topics