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[quote=Anonymous]I’m not suggesting he needs to jump up instantly when DC needs something. But he is the king of either magically not hearing the requests for help (like he can go 10 minutes just not even responding and when I finally get sick of it and say “here, I can get that down for you” he’s surprised). Or he’ll say, “just a minute” and the minute is literally endless. I have watched him “just a minute” for an hour. And our DC just progressively melts down in this time.

It sucks because it makes me feel like I always have to be the one to help, and of course that means our kid comes to me first for everything. I try to only do this when it’s really important (DH will even try to delay bathroom requests, which drives me up a wall, and then he’ll get annoyed with an accident and I’m like “you should be annoyed with yourself!”). But also: our kid rarely whines and is good at saying please and is generally polite. I can’t stand watching DH just ignore or postpone totally reasonable, polite requests because I want to reward that behavior.

Also, usually these delays are because he is in his computer, iPad, or phone. Sometimes he’s reading or working, but most often he’s scrolling Twitter or playing a game. This drives me nuts, especially the games. The games are especially annoying to me.

If I express frustration with this, he tells me he just has a different parenting style or he gets annoyed and says “I don’t work for you.” I’m sick of it. I think he’s just being lazy and relying on me to pick up his slack, and I also worry about the impact this will have long term on our kid, both on the relationship with DH and in the behaviors DH is modeling.

Advice?[/quote]

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