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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Trust your gut and do NOT marry your BF.  The fact that he decided early on that you were the one and has gotten harsh with you over time sounds like he maybe love-bombed you at the beginning and is on his way to being abusive.

Also, dump your therapist.  His advise is terrible.

You can have children without a spouse, but you definitely don't want to have children with someone you don't love or respect, or even worse, someone you are afraid of.[/quote]

Unfortunately I am confused about the therapist also. He is the best one I’ve ever had (previously had female therapists for other subjects but this time sought out a male for different perspective on my specific set of issues). It seemed to be a good thing that I met my almost-fiancé within a few months of starting treatment with him. But at times I feel that it’s only bc of therapist that I am even able to be in this relationship. But that may be a testament to helpfulness of therapy. Am very fond of the therapist which I recognize is a projection and part of the therapy, and I try to transfer those positive vibes to my BF. I am confused though about whether overall positive vibes about therapist are masking or affecting my judgment about BF (which if true would mean therapist is also somehow blind to this), basically very much questioning my own perceptions and judgement which is made more difficult by the fact that I am open to change, which is why I’m in treatment, but now feel that bc of it my compass that I entered therapy to change, is maybe not reliable.[/quote]

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