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[quote=Anonymous]Has anyone ever had a friend who turns out to be a narcissist, where that friend's behavior became abusive? I am struggling a bit because this happened to me but it sometimes feels like a weird outlier experience. Most people who have experienced narcissistic abuse seem to have experienced it in romantic relationships or with an immediate family member. I also grew up with a narcissist in my immediate family which I know is why I was attracted to this friend in the first place. But I still sometimes feel unusually gullible and vulnerable for having fallen into this pattern with a friend.

Even my therapist does not seem to view what happened with my friend as a significant issue. She is much more interested in discussing my childhood experience. I understand why, because of course my childhood experience laid the groundwork for everything else. But I know I have specific feelings around what happened with my friend that I need to explore and discuss, and she just doesn't seem that interested or seem to think it matters as much.

Sometimes it feels like the relationship doesn't matter or I should have just gotten over it by now (it has been two years since I went no contact with that friend) because it was "just" a friendship. But in a weird way I think that attitude is exactly why I still feel like I'm not totally over it -- because no one seems to think it mattered in the first place. Whereas I feel like I've reached a real point of resolution and peace with regards to my narcissistic family member because that is a situation people, including my therapist, seem to think merits discussing and addressing.

Anyone else deal with this? I know friendships aren't as entangling as romantic relationships or family, but they do still matter. Why is it so hard to talk about how a relationship with a narcissistic friend had a lasting effect on you without sounding like you are being melodramatic about it?[/quote]

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