Reply to Calling all nice people - what to do about the mean people on DCUM

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I've been a DCUM since 2003 when it was a listserve and you didn't often get the vitrolic, accusatory responses like you get on the forum. I like the forum format and post most frequently on the Special Needs forum and don't encounter this a lot (and trolls/negative people are usually just ignored).  But I recently started this thread http://www.dcurbanmom.com/jforum/posts/list/209337.page .  I am/was looking for information from people who had experience with temporary guardianship or had information to offer.  [b]When the majority of responses were from people who had no experience and were, instead, negative and unhelpful,[/b] I asked Jeff if he would be so kind to ask people to stick to the question asked and he did.  I have no problem doing that because I had already asked people to stick to the question asked and Jeff has made it clear that he wants DCUM to be a place people find useful, participate and feel comfortable posting.  When my post gets hijacked like that, I appreciate that he's willing to help get it back on course.  I've also reported threads to him where a significant number of posts were abusive to the OP or not furthering discussion.  I don't often do that but I, too, want DCUM to be useful place.  Some posts are for discussion, some are from seeking information, some are seeking support.  It's an open forum put that doesn't mean it's a free for all.  People are welcome to start their own threads if they want to debate or pontificate.

Of course, not everyone feels the same way.  When Jeff intervened in my thread, someone complained to him via the Feedback forum http://www.dcurbanmom.com/jforum/posts/list/209397.page .  I think he explains further his thoughts on the website and his actions.  I don't report very often, I usually try to ignore or nicely ask that people limit responses to the question asked.  But, I do appreciate Jeff's willingness to keep an eye on things.  I hope it lasts.[/quote]

No, people were challenging the very premise of your very bad idea and you went crying to Jeff because you couldn't handle it, and, yes, he responded, but he's catching grief for it on the feedback page now because what he did, really, was stifle a legitimate discussion to appease your own delicate sensibilities. I understand Jeff's reason for doing it, although I disagree with it and believe he hurt the site's credibility to some degree. Those weren't snarky responses. Those were bonafide objections to the idea that you were trying to get custody of someone else's children. [/quote]

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